Red Man Staring!

I saw this angry red man and he was staring at me! I did not feel at all at ease. I was wondering what I might possibly have done to displease him? In fact I was getting rather worried, but then a green man showed up and told me that I could go and I was ever so relieved!


It’s Myday!

Myspring by Ralphie!

I vote we get rid of the calendar altogether. Who needs is anyway? It’s so annoying, don’t you think? What day is it? Who cares! Wouldn’t it be nice, if you could just say: “Why, it’s Myday!” No more waiting for Thank-God-it’s-Friday ever again!

The same goes of course for weeks and months, if anybody asks: “But Sir/Madam, it’s Myweek in Mymonth!”

I would loosely allow for the season’s to be kept on. But just to be annoying, I’m having Myspring now, instead of later on in Mymonth. Hey, the sun is shining and it’s pleasantly warm here in the south of Spain, so why not. You can have Yourwinter, should you so choose!

And evidently, I was born in MYyear. Duh!! Did you have to ask?

I could write much, much more on this riveting topic, but I’m having Myholiday, so I can’t be bothered! Nananananh…

If you vote Ralphie for Internet President, I shall make this the first amendment to Myconstitution, make that Ourconstitution. Unless you would like Yourownconstitution, which would be ok by me.

Wiring Expert Needed!


Image by Laurabot_ via Flickr

Why is it that my mouth runs off by itself, without my authorisation?

Why is it that my thoughts come so fast that my tongue can not keep up?

Is there something wrong with the cabling?

The distance between the two is not that far!

The shortest distance between point A and B is a straight line, is it not?

Well, not in the case of the wiring between my chatterbox and my mind!

Perhaps the connection has been scrambled or the translator has gone home!

In any case, I’m in a right pickle and this mess should be sorted out. A wiring expert is needed. I shall place an ad and pray that the right one comes along, for to fix this quagmire of inconsistencies a genius should be found.

An additional problem springs to mind: what if said genius were to show up, how would I get my blither-muscle to cooperate in explaining what I need? Another conundrum indeed!

Stuff your Political Correctness Up…

Butterfly - by Google/imgres

You’ve done it now, yes, YOU! You’ve pissed me off, I, who am normally as equanimical as a mountain, as softly spoken as a blade of grass and as understanding as a hole in a tree! Have you ever in your life tried to have an argument with a hole in a tree? You should really try it! My point is that calling a turd by any other name, will not make it any less smelly! And conversely, calling a butterfly a bucket will not make it any less beautiful. It is all a matter of perception, but above all of embracing your being different from that most foul of things: the norm!

I happen to have a slight problem with my eyesight, in that I have to wear glasses. Does calling these glasses, spectacles make me more respectable? And more importantly, does it allow me to see better? You can call me four-eyes, if you so choose, but that would not change one iota of my humanity. It would only prove to me that you’re a fool! But should I get upset over it, for that is the question? That is up to me. If I feel insecure about something, then I can get upset over any word and at any moment in time. But changing the word will not change the circumstance.

I’m going to go out on a limb now and I don’t give a damn if a get a lot of flak about it. I shall take the for instance of black people. I happen to admire black people and I think they are beautiful, but calling them “people of African descent” does not change the lovely colour of their skin! And please let’s leave out the hypocrisy, it will not change the past! Bloody lighten up everybody, will you! I am called white, but I just looked in the mirror and I don’t see anything that suggests the non-colour white, when I look at my skin. Again, calling me that does not change anything about my being a human being, like all the rest of my brothers and sisters.

In fact, I am not at all proud to be numbered amongst the white race. Because, when you look at history, it must be said that we are the BEST! The best at taking what is not ours, the best at corrupting and/or  utterly destroying other cultures, the best at genocide. No, I am not proud about what the white man has done. We seem to be the worst subspecies of Homo Idioticus, in that we seem to want to destroy everything that’s beautiful and sincere on this planet and if we get the chance, we’ll take our arrogance out into space. But when push comes to shove, it’s only a label, for I am my own MAN and I take responsibility for my own actions.

Alright, I shall join the club of labellers and make up my own. I henceforth insist on being known as a member of the species known as U-man, as in “I love U”! And U and U and all of U! And I don’t give a shit, if you’re short or tall or white or polka dot, as long are you’re part of my worldwide family of U-mans…

P.S.: After realising that I might have formerly maligned turds, I should say in their defense that I have seen some quite interesting looking ones!

P.P.S.: I should also state that I have some friends that are white and they seem sort of Ok! Hey, even my family is white, but I refuse to take the blame for that or they for me, for that matter.

P.P.P.S.:  By the way, isn’t “politically correct” an oxymoron? Whoever came up with that one: Richard Nixon? I’m going to rechristen it “politically expedient” right now!

Am I Weird or What?

Love Is the Answer (album)

Image via Wikipedia

No need to answer that question. I know the answer already! I had a visit here on my site from a lady,who likes to spread love around. Not the kinky kind! I find this a very commendable attitude. I visited her site and came across the lyrics to the Julio Iglesias song: To all the Girls(she changed this to Men) I’ve Loved Before and this got me thinking. Mmmm… yeah, I know. Here we go again! There must be something about me that is not like most people, definitely! Ok, I’ll stop stating the bleedin’ obvious. But just this once, I’m serious!

In my life during my associations with acquaintances, friends and family, I’ve heard the following saying quite a number of times: “I don’t love you anymore!” This was not always directed at me, you understand. I have also read this a lot and heard it a lot in songs and on television. This does not hold true for me! Once I love someone, she or he is in my heart and a part of me forever, period! I do not seem to have an off-switch for love. Continue reading

Sunspots: MelaMoona?

C3-class Solar Flare Erupts on Sept. 8, 2010 [...

Image by NASA Goddard Photo and Video via Flickr

Occupy Old Sol, or New Chinese Manufacturing Markets.

Check out Old Jules’ site and read all about sunspots and the imminent(possible) solar flare of  gigantic proportions. He has some magnificent pictures!

A Solar Flare, image taken by the TRACE satell...

Image via Wikipedia

I was wondering if the Sun has developed this condition due to too much Moonshine? Have the Chinese been selling it illegally to the Solarians? Are Solar flares a mayday beacon from Solarian economists? Is Wall Street involved? Inquiring minds would like to know!

Multiple Worlds…

Marge Simpson

Image via Wikipedia

I was talking a walk through the shimmering light of awakening dawn, still half asleep myself, when I stumbled upon an ancient portal that looked somehow familiar. The time-worn alabaster frame had writings on it, which triggered stirrings of forgotten ancestral memories, rising like bubbles from a primeval bog. One persistent feeling forced itself to the foreground: a sense of plurality, of never being alone, which was far from unpleasant, inviting even. The path leading up to it was worn as if legions had trodden there over eons. The age-old conundrum of ‘should we or should we not?’ forced itself upon me. Did I just say ‘should WE’? Am I finally loosing it? But curiosity has ever been my weakest strength and my most forceful fault, so in I went. Continue reading

#WTF: robot called Big Dog

#WTF: robot llamado Big Dog.

Watch this video! I was wondering if this particular robot was a bit tipsy.

WVNA-FM logo

Image via Wikipedia


Whatever will they think of next?









Your Stars – according to Ralphie!


Lib(e)rating stuff without people´s consent, is not a done thing! If you want to win the lottery, you should buy a ticket(it helps!).


Don´t forget to put on sun cream, when you´re in the desert! Sting made some nice music, but stop waving that thing at me or I´ll call the Police!


If unemployed, try Cupid. He needs a hand! Where were you, when General Custer needed you?


I´m tired of being the butt of your jokes! They eat it ´on the cob´ in that isle!


Stop hogging the bathroom! Are you homeless? Get an aquarium!


Clean out your bowl. It´s a mess! Doesn´t it feel like your swimming around in circles?
Alright. you are exempt from eating fish on Good Friday!


Get off that mountaintop and socialise! Temper, temper! Love is good, love is nice!


Red does not become you! And don´t think that the grass is always greener on the other side!


I sense a duality about you! But you´re both jewels(mini ones but nice!).


You do grow on people. Leave it out! The Little Mermaid needs help!


You may call yourself King of the Jungle, but you’re a teddy bear! Ever heard of equal rights? Stop letting the females do all the work!


Look up Aries, convince him to stop making war and…???! ´Those´ crisps are really yummy! No love in your tummy yet?