After loud outcries from the blind community about violations of their right to know, certain governmental bodies have relented in certain parts of the globe and are now allowing graffiti for the blind. At long last the visually impaired will also get to know where Kilroy has been! Apparently they do not subscribe to the following point of view: “Man’s ambition must be small, to write his name on a shithouse wall!”
Said graffiti are created with the aid of a contraption that transcribes any text message into Braille, on sticky tape. But soon after Braille graffiti were up, some prankster decided to play a peevish joke by making the readable side sticky aswell. One hopes that future practical jokers will abstain from resorting to “smelly” pranks. A friendly warning to our Braille graffiti readers: sniff them first! Although, come to think of it, inoffensive smells could be added and guide dogs for the blind trained to sniff them out…
Some of these transcribing contraptions have already been installed in some toilets in Australia. If ever you see a dotted and spotted lavatory door over there, you will know that some dirty old blind Aussie was there. Or should I say some unsanitary Australian of indiscriminate age, who happened to be visually impaired?
The possibility is being explored of putting miniaturised sound machines in public conveniences, which would allow philanthropical-minded visitors to read the graffiti out loud into the microphone, for the benefit of their blind brethren. Although in this instance fair warning should be given to occupants of other cubicles! And the question begs to be asked, if this would then not be unfair to the hearing-impaired, who might miss certain nuances of unsavoury jokes or witty addenda by the narrator?
As it is known that taggers tend to place their signatures in the most inaccessible places, we should implore Braille readers not to start climbing bridges or go wandering along railway tracks in search of them, for this would surely constitute a safety hazard. Guided tours might be an option!
And what about regions where graffiti for the blind have not yet been legalised? Will law enforcement officers now have to learn Braille in order to be able to ascertain whether a certain message should be considered inappropriate and/or illegal? After penitentiary facilities everywhere have filled up with blind people, should these institutions then be adapted to their special needs? Will non-blind tax-payers agree to the prohibitive cost of said adaptations with their tax dollars? Methinks that Kilroy has a lot to answer for!
Unexpected rumblings of discontent from the seeing community have surfaced, after reports of instances of gatherings by blind people, who were laughing their tits off and refused to divulge the reason for their hilarity to unfortunate seeing onlookers, who mistakenly thought that they might be the butt of some joke. Some incidents of fisticuffs took place, which in turn placed the blind at a disadvantage. People from both parties were remanded to the courts, which will have to disentangle this case of unusual discrimination.
Whereas urban legal departments have taken the lead in allowing these practices, the pastoral communities are still lagging behind. One farmer was sued, for not putting up a notice in Braille about the danger of electrified wires surrounding his cattle field, by an unfortunate blind person who had answered a call of nature there and ended up in the emergency ward of the nearest hospital. Frankly, he really needed to know!