From my sweet wife, Kimberly Maclean:
A octogenarian is walking down the street, when he sees a sign: “Job Vacancy!”. He wouldn’t mind filling his days gainfully and strolls in and tells the HR person that he is interested in the position. The Human Rubbish person tells him that this implies knowledge of high-tech and is really fast paced. The man says to test him and lo and behold he aces the first test. And the second and… heck, all of them!
The Human Rubbish person thinks this very strange and decides to throw him a curve ball. He tells the old man that he is required to test his sperm count and hands him a container. The man says: “What in the blazes do you need my sperm count for???” The dude tells him it’s on the list and that’s that! Our ace asks if he can bring the container back in the morning and is given permission to do so.
The next morning the elderly gentleman comes in and puts the ’empty’ container on the HR person’s desk. The guy says: “Hunhh!???” Well, says the ace, I tried with my left hand, I tried with my right hand. Then my Missus tried with her teeth in and then she tried with her teeth out… But we still couldn’t open the container!