The Gunfighter – Joke


From boatwright.deviantart.com
From boatwright.deviantart.com

From Rapolis on Experience Project :

A young cowboy sitting in a saloon one Saturday night recognized  an  elderly man standing at the bar who, in his day, had been the fastest gun in the West.

The  cowboy took a place next to the  old-timer, bought him a drink  and told him of his great ambition to be a great shot…

‘Could you give me some tips?’ he asked.

The  old man said, ‘Well, for one thing, you’re wearing your gun too high – tie the holster a little lower down on your leg.’

‘Will that make me a better gunfighter?’

‘Sure will ‘

The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped out his .44 and shot the bow tie off the piano player.

‘That’s terrific!’ said the cowboy. ‘Got any more tips?’

‘Yep,’ said the old man. ‘Cut a notch out of your holster where the hammer hits it – that’ll give you a smoother draw’

‘Will that make me a better gunfighter?’ asked the young man.

‘You bet it will,’ said the  old-timer.

The young  man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his gun in a blur, and then shot a cufflink off the piano  player.

‘Wow!’ exclaimed the cowboy ‘I’m learnin’ somethin’ here. Got any more tips?’

The old man pointed to a large can in a corner of the saloon. ‘See that axle grease over there? Coat  your gun with it.’

The young man smeared some of the grease on the barrel of his gun.

‘No,’ said the old-timer, ‘I mean smear it all over the gun, handle and all.’

‘Will that make me a better gunfighter?’ asked the young man.

‘No,’ said the old-timer, ‘but when Wyatt Earp gets done playing the piano, he’s gonna shove that gun up right up your arse, and it won’t hurt as much.

Published by raburcke

I am a comedy writer, oil painter and the founder of this site. Do join me and we will make it a place that everyone will be happy to visit.

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