After viewing the below video, I realised that I am missing something vital, of great import in society: a Christmas jumper! Does this mean that I have no social identity? Could I wear a tag to make up for it. Is there a self-help group that could help me with this issue?

The issue has been resolved: I called my Mum and explained the dichotomy and she answered me that ‘us social non-entities'(without a Christmas sweater, that is) may very well be lucky to be ignored by those, who have been identified. In fact, she went on, if looking like a complete moron is what it takes to be socially identified, we’re better off without it(the identification and the sweater, of course).

She will send me some Christmas sock though. She’s such a dear! Anyways, happy holidays to all of you from Ralphie and the gang over here at Ralphie’s Portal.

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